Wednesday, June 12, 2024

How to Make Your School Children Stop Fighting

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Adetunji Matthew
Adetunji Matthew
I’m Adetunji Matthew, an Economist, Social Media Manager, software Developer/Marketer Sales Consultant, and Ecompreneur. I’m popularly known as “Matt” As an artist and designer, I aim to create something brilliant daily. Eager to learn more, I use my free time to get better at w hat interests me, whether it's researching, teaching, or even something entirely new.
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My Sons can’t play together for 20 Minutes, my Daughters don’t play without fighting, my children always fight at home. These are common complaints parents have about their kids worldwide.

First, you’re not the only mom or dad affected. Secondly, school children below 10 years fighting at home is normal and doesn’t mean they don’t love each other. Thirdly, there are certain measures you can take to make your school children stop fighting.

ere are Opinions from Parents and Guardians (names withheld) on reasons siblings fight at home, whether it is normal for school children to fight at home and steps to make your school children stop fighting.

Take It Easy on your Children

Don’t worry, only they will settle it by themselves and for themselves when they come of age. It’s normal amongst siblings at a very young age. Just keep educating them on brotherhood/togetherness and love amongst siblings. They will outgrow it, talking from experience.

In fact, very funny my sons can’t play together for more than 20 minutes without fighting because the age difference is just a year 3 months.

There was a day I settled quarrel, that day shouted and taught I have developed high blood pressure the following day I went for check-up and the doctor said nothing happened to me that the result is normal since then I stopped disturbing my self and if anyone of them is not around the other one will not be okay.

I now realize that is normal especially if they are boys they can fight themselves for Africa. May we mothers reap the fruits of our sweat.

Preach Love To Your Kids

After talking to them about love and not finding fault, as soon as you close your mouth you start hearing mummy warn Gina o. you begin to wonder, is it normal?

They would fight over everything but let one fall sick or travel you will know how they love each other. The major thing I do is I don’t take side. I scold them equally Then give task to do together.

Your Kids Don’t Hate One Another

Is it that they hate each other? Obviously No. Forget it, they love each other, let someone else try to fight one of them, then you’ll know they love each other. They’re just being kids, with time they’ll change.

They all fight, it’s normal and within a few minutes play has started again. Upon they fight, they always protect and support one another. If you want to punish one of them, the others will beg and even try to cover up.

I just finish settling them. They fight at any slight opportunity. But if one is not around, the rest will be crying that he should come back now. The incessant fight is common among same-sex. Too many boys or girls.

They love each other that’s why they fight. However, always listen to the cause of every fight and cash in on the opportunity to talk to them about loving themselves and always looking out for themselves.

Your Kids Learn From You

They may have copied from neighbour or parents. Daddy and mummy should be their example. So many children grew up “fighting”, but when you say they can’t stay together for 10mins without fighting, then I think there is something that’s not right. Daddy and mummy, you need to be their first example in the way you live. They are watching you too.

Teach Your Kids Apology

You have to start now before it’s too late. Talk to them as adults, make both of them apologize to each other after telling them the reasons they should not fight.

And tell them to report to you and not to take action by themselves. In the end, tell them to give each other a big hug. Do this even when they didn’t fight and you will see the changes.

Ignore The Fights Sometimes

Don’t shout at them every time. Sometimes, Pretend you didn’t hear them fight (on the occasion that the fight is not serious), Go inside your room, Lock the door, relax, come outside, Cook, Call them to eat. And you will all live fine happily ever after. Take that from a mother of three boys aged 16,12 and 10.

Use Cane if Necessary

Don’t let anyone pretend or deceive u, even if u like preach for them from now till tomorrow, they will only calm when they see your face but will continue in your absence. It is normal, be calm & talk to them, then put a little fear in them. Use cane on them when needed as the bible says. They will outgrow it.

Give Instructions No One Should Violate

You only give instructions that no one should violate…..YOU MUST NOT FIGHT, NO MATTER WHAT. WHETHER I AM AROUND OR NOT. Thereby, they will learn to tolerate one another. It works in my home till now, even when they are grown.

Tell Them Stories, Children Stop Fighting

My 2 boys fight over everything, I took it first, no me, stand up, I sat here 1st, drop it, is it your own, go away, I came here 1st, I want to check something give me the remote, am watching something, change it, No I want to watch this, leave it, I want to use it, don’t touch it, you are not using it now, am not giving you, give me now, why did you touch it, I said it 1st, remove your leg, oh my God.

I talk to them, I pray with them, I teach them bible stories and all that, in fact, am planning on taking one to boarding school for JSS.

Make Sure Your Kids Eat Together

Make sure they eat together, share things and read together. Call the eating together ” a love feast”. After their quarrel tell them to apologise to each other and hug themselves. Very important. It works. My children are so friendly even now that they are grown up.

Prohibit the Use of Certain Words

You didn’t start it from the beginning. In my house, saying ‘I will slap you ‘is prohibited. Likewise any other dirty words. They report issues. Work on them with the scriptures.

Teach Them To Watch Out For Each Other

Ask them to take food to each other from the kitchen – like when you finish cooking, you can call any one of them any day to come and take the food and give to his/her brethren.

It could be clothes, tell one of them to go and pick the clothes of the other person from the line because it’s about to rain. This way, you’re indirectly teaching them to be compassionate, love and always watch out for each other.

Fiction And Real Life Stories

You thought it is only you, my three girls fight always at any slightest things, especially the two senior ones, and they settle in and begin to play again.

Sometimes, I watch the show, only for the funny ones but I always intervene for the serious ones, there is nothing you and I can do about it. I have my own ways of educating them about sisterly love and family as a whole, friction stories and real-life stories and it is now working for me.

They will be the one to remind me sometimes about FAMILY EDUCATION, I try as much as I can to create topics in each session every weekend. It is not easy to train and guide children whether boys or girls.

Give Them Equal Punishments

When my children were younger, I give them equal punishment. The one crying and the one who made that one cry and the one who was watching all the things happening.

Then, when I am scolding one of them, I make sure I look for something to rope the others inside the matter. That way, next time they assist each other so as not to fall victim.

Because at the end of the day, they are all affected. It is also with praises. Also when I share things among them, I give them equally. And they all know that they are the special same way to me. I have no favourite.

How to Make Your School Children Stop Fighting. Hope you love what you just read? Feel free to drop your comment and don’t fail to share with others using the comment box.

Read: 5 Ways To Help Your Children Succeed Academically


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